Ok, so I definitely have a love/hate relationship with myself. But at this time, I feel the hate outweighs the love, so I am on a mission to turn that around. What I like about this day 2 assignment is that you are forced to be honest with yourself and truly recognize what you are unhappy about in your life. I recommend doing this exercise by yourself so you do not have any outside influences.
Without further a due, here is my response!
Lifestyle
Like: I love that I don't have the responsibility of paying rent right now because I go back and forth living with my mom and aunt due to work. This allows me to pay off some debt that I have accumulated over the last two years.
Dislike: I am so mad that I let my finances get so out of whack that I fill like I never have any money to do anything. I always have a stomach ache thinking about what I owe and things I need to get done. I always think about the future, and I feel that the situation I am in now will not help my future lifestyle. I also hate that I compare myself to other people so damn much. While I feel swallowed whole in the money situation, I feel not good enough because I can't go out and afford things that I like. But then again, I am aware that I am not disciplined enough to save my money and take care of my finances (but all of that is going to change).
Work
Like: I love that I work for my family. It gives me flexibility, open communication, and makes life a little more fun.
Dislike: Working for my family does not pay me enough money to take care of the things I need done. I feel embarrassed sometimes because I feel like at my age, I should be embarking on a career of some sort or having a "real job".
Education
Like: I love that I am smart and it is very easy for me to get into school. I genuinely like going to school, which makes things a little easier. I am also very happy, that I took a little while off to find what I actually wanted to go to school for.
Dislike: I hate that a lot of my friends are already graduating from college or are doing really big things with their education (i.e. becoming doctors, lawyers, entrepreneurs). I hate that everyone and their mother thinks that I am not going back to school because I took a couple years off. I hate that I gave up a full ride scholarship to "find myself" even though I know in my heart I did it for a good reason. I hate that I am going to have to work and go to school for the first time, which I am kind of getting stressed about.
Finances
Like: I love that it is always easy for me to find a job or to work for my family to get money.
Dislike: I absolutely HATE my financial situation. I am $10,000 in debt (which may not seem like a lot to some of you, but when you barely get paid......it is), I have a shopping problem, and I find it very overwhelming and disappointing to acknowledge my dues, so I just shove them to the side like I don't owe anyone anything. And once again, due to my low self esteem and the need to be like other people, I am always trying to find a way to due that. I just always feel like why shouldn't I be spending money and having fun like other people my age. *le sigh*
Health
Like: ........well I guess I'm not morbidly obese....so.....yay for that.
Dislike: I am 80 lbs overweight, I am an emotional eater, I literally have 2% will power, and I have no urge to go work out. Yes, it is my choice to do this, and don't get me wrong, I want to change, but I just need to stick to it. I am all talk and no action.
Family
Like: I love that we are all so close and can talk to each other whenever we need to. My family is freakin' hilarious and they are always there when you need them. Not strict, very free spirited, and gives awesome advice, if you choose to accept it.
Dislike: How some of my family make impressing friends more important than being a close knit family. How they tell you to do one thing, but do the total opposite. Sometimes make me feel bad about myself.
Relationships
Like: Love that I have a few good friends to go out with and always have a good time and a good laugh. Love that I have an amazing girlfriend who has brought a lot of me out from the dark. I have definitely learned a lot about myself and things that I need to work on.
Dislike: I hate that I can never keep any friends. I lost touch with most of my friends after high school. I really want to meet some cool people that I can go out with all the time and will be there when I need to get away (something like Sex and the City). I hate that I feel that me and my gf are drifting apart. We have been together for almost 3 years and have literally "been together" for 95% of those 3 years. It is wearing on me and hurting me because I feel that I am ready to be alone for a while and she is ready to take the next step (marriage), which is also a bummer because I told her I am ready for all of that too. But now I'm not. It's turned into a big emotional mess because I am one that does not like to hurt people feelings, so I have no clue how to handle this without some hearts being torn. Plus I also have a worrying problem, so I get really scared thinking about her doing things on her own. But maybe that is what I need to go through?
xo.
Audri
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